Audible Farting Banned By Marines So As To Not Offend Afghans

No, this is not a piece from the Onion. It was reported by Gina Cavallaro in Military Times (via Jihad Watch)

Marine Corps Times is a family newspaper and we only rarely have offensive language in our stories.

But this week the word “fart” appears in a story I wrote about the importance of trust between Marines and the Afghan national army soldiers they work with.

I didn’t want to write this little blog entry about farts. It’s not even on my beat. But my colleague Dan Lamothe, whose byline you have seen here quite often, shamed me into it.

“You owe it to all Marines,” he told me.

So here’s the news: audible farting has been banned for some Marines downrange because it offends the Afghans.

Cussing has been banned for a long time. No alcohol when serving in Islamic countries. No porn, even a simple Playboy. No talking about religion, politics, or girls. I’m think that it might be nice if the Religion of Peace ban jihad in the name of Allah.

Just remember, Heavenly virgins don’t piss, poop or fart says Muslim ‘expert’ on matters celestial. It is forbidden in Islam to laugh when someone farts (down near the end of article). Then there’s the art of dealing with a fart in Islam. Seriously, Islam deals quite a bit with “breaking wind.” I don’t remember the Bible even mentioning it.

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3 Responses to “Audible Farting Banned By Marines So As To Not Offend Afghans”

  1. gitarcarver says:

    Woo Hoo!!

    This means that Obama won’t be able to speak to the troops in Afghanistan!

    I am sure they appreciate it.

  2. david7134 says:

    Exactly why are we still in Afghanistan? It does not make sense. We need out of there and allow the people to kill themselves.

  3. […] Bill Teach: Audible Farting Banned By Marines So As To Not Offend Afghans […]

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