Fat People Cause Climate Change

Or so says the AP. Has anyone checked The Goracle’s poundage lately?

America’s obesity epidemic and global warming might not seem to have much in common. But public health experts suggest people can attack them both by cutting calories and carbon dioxide at the same time.

How? Get out of your car and walk or bike half an hour a day instead of driving. And while you’re at it, eat less red meat. That’s how Americans can simultaneously save the planet and their health, say doctors and climate scientists.

The payoffs are huge, although unlikely to happen. One numbers-crunching scientist calculates that if all Americans between 10 and 74 walked just half an hour a day instead of driving, they would cut the annual U.S. emissions of carbon dioxide, the chief greenhouse gas, by 64 million tons.

About 6.5 billion gallons of gasoline would be saved. And Americans would also shed more than 3 billion pounds overall, according to these calculations.

Well, let’s face it: the part about exercise and cutting calories is actually a good idea for all of us. I could stand to lose about 20 myself. But to combine it with the rediculous global warming as caused by Man is, well, rediculous. Chiefly because CO2 is not the chief greenhouse gas; methane is. Methane is considerably more pervasive, and much worse for “trapping heat.” What we really need to do is get rid of all Mexican eateries and any other spicy foods

Next thing you know, we will have “carbon neutral” diet plans, sneakers, and bikes. Maybe some carbon neutral exercise clothing lines. Because climate change is not, in reality, about getting people to change their habits; it is about getting people to shell out big bucks for things like carbon offsets. Why else would the leaders go on with their lives as usual? Why else would all the disciples always have an excuse to not change their lives to be in accord with their views on global warming? I have come to the conclusion that, unlike, say, taxes, they do not want everyone else except themselves to live the life they extoll. They want everyone else to pony up to the Carbon Offset ATM.

However, like me, lose a few pounds, tubby! You’ll feel better, too. 

Save $10 on purchases of $49.99 & up on our Fruit Bouquets at 1800flowers.com. Promo Code: FRUIT49
If you liked my post, feel free to subscribe to my rss feeds.

Both comments and trackbacks are currently closed

2 Responses to “Fat People Cause Climate Change”

  1. Silke says:

    Teach, I’m glad you recognize that methane (one of the four principal long-lived greenhouse gases resulting from human activities that alter the earth’s energy balance) is a serious problem. According to climate scientists, however, CO2 is about three times more responsible for the current warming trend then methane (1.66 watts/square meter vs. .48 watts/square meter).:

    Could you please cite the source for your information on methane?

  2. darthcrUSAderworldtour2007 says:

    Inform John Ryan, Ted Kennedy and Jerry Nadler of this! – Supersized Asses 2007

Pirate's Cove