My Predictions

Everyone else out there is making their predictions for 2005, I figured that it is time to make some myself.

  • George Bush will be inaugurated. (happened)
  • The big weenie, John Kerry (he is a US Senator, you know) will not break 40% attendance for votes.
  • Teresa Heinz Kerry will say something incredibly insensitive in public.
  • Liberals will still be complaining about Ohio on December 31st.
  • George Soros will not join a monastery as promised.
  • Michael Moore will release another anti Bush movie that will suck the money from the Libs.
  • Moore will not suffer his heart attack till September (that is my only Dead Pool pick).
  • Verifiable proof of Democratic fraud will be found and nullify the results of the Washington Governors race.
  • With all due respect to Jeremy of American Warmonger, Usama will be caught in Kashmir, after India and Pakistan finally formalize a peace accord over that region.
  • North Korea and Iran will not give up their nuclear programs.
  • The elections in Iraq will be a modest success, forcing the parties who dropped out to want in. (success)
  • Syria will not stop the cross border incursions into Iraq
  • The duly elected government of Iraq will threaten Syria with force if they do not stop the incursions.
  • Jordan will make peace with Israel
  • The Revenge of the Sith will not suck, and will have a completely different tone then the Phantom Menace and Attack of the Clones. It will be very dark, with less of the silliness. Think "The Empire Strikes Back."
  • Arafat’s billions will be found, and given to the Palestinian People. The attacks on Israel will decrease dramatically.
  • There will not be any sort of accord between the Palestinian’s and Israeli’s, but a tone will be set for a lasting cease fire for 2006. Think North Ireland/England.
  • Saudi Arabia will be hit with a terrible Al Queda attack by summer.
    The United States will not.
  • Gas will drop to around $1.60 for 87
  • The NHL will not get a deal done, and there will be no 2005-2006 season, either. (1/2 right, so far)
  • February and March will have really bad weather, tons of snow and ice storms. (right so far)
  • The Democratic Underground will not be shut down. They give us Conservatives to much material to want them shut down.
  • Mt. St. Helens will have a minor boom. Nothing like 1980. (right)
  • The UN, Kofi, and Kofi’s son will not get away with the Oil For Food Scandal. Documents found in Iraq will be released after a full Congressional inquiry. UN attempts to create scapegoats will not work. France and Russia will be implicated to a point where even liberals will have to abandon the UN.
  • Britney Spears will be sued over nasty side effects from her perfume Curious. Then divorced.
  • The Eagles will not make it to the Super Bowl. (wrong)
  • The Steelers will beat Green Bay, 35-28 (wrong)
  • The Red Sox will not make the playoffs. Nor will the Mets
  • The NY Giants will win 10 games next season.
  • The Democrats will not be able to stop a reformation of either Social Security or the taxation system, though the reformations will not go far enough for Conservatives.
  • Mo Dowd will be forced out of the New York Times when the Editors realize that her use of lots of fancy words covers up sincerely idiotic writing which is based solely on "I hate Bush."
  • My copy of Pirates of the Caribbean will be burned out.
  • Dan Rather will not go gently into the good night (wrong, sort of)
  • Bloggers will continue to catch the MSM’s, and will take Chrissie "no way am I going over there" Matthews down. (got Eason Jordan, course that part was a sucker’s bet)
  • The Atkins Diet will not survive 2005, and will be replaced with a resurgence of real exercise. Bring on the babes in spandex!
  • Someone will do something extremely stupid, and the media will bloviate on it for months. Probably Slick.
  • Hillary’s attempts to act like a conservative will not work, as the Dean version of the Democratic Party becomes the norm.

I think that is enough. Nothing to outlandish, to crazy. Except that the world will be taken over by giant space parrots.

I think that is enough. Nothing to outlandish, to crazy. Except that the world will be taken over by giant space pirate parrots in September. I will add this to my calendar and check it next December. I am looking forward to the Parrots thing. Savvy?


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5 Responses to “My Predictions”

  1. Julie says:

    Hey, I agree with you on most of these but I don’t think Osama will be caught. I mean, after all this time, looks like he’d already been caught if he was going to be. Until the past few months, I honestly thought he was dead (we’re not lucky enough for that) but caught or not, there’ll always be some idiot that wants to walk in his shoes that will be a thorn in our side ..we’ll always be chasing somebody be it Osama or someone else..

  2. Jeremy says:

    The Osama thing can be debated all night. I need to make you a few corrections:

    Britney will be sued over the concert tour she skipped out on with a “bad knee” not her nasty perfume. But she will get divorced…and re-married.

    I still think the Red Sox will make the playoffs only to be crushed by the Yanks. It’s gotta be. Of course, this is another debatable one: How crappy will the Sox be next year?

    Where I’m at, gas is already 1.60 and dropping. I can get a gallon with my Sam’s card for 1.53$.

    You need to drop by and put in a link to this one. They’re doing a link round-up thingie.

  3. I tried to go there, but it’s not working.

  4. Jeremy says:

    Strange, it works for me?

  5. Got in. Had to do do a restart. Net was being slow, anyhow. Sent him and email about it.

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