Friday Nut Fun (on Friday this time!)

We have had Liberal Amendments 1 and 2, 3 and 4, 5 and 6, and 7 and 8. Time for the next two

Amendment 9: The enumeration in The Constitution of rights shall be construed to deny or discourage others which may from time to time be extended by the branches of Federal, State or Local government, unless such rights shall themselves become enacted by Amendment, which will only be enacted by the same Federal and State governments.

Amendment 10: The powers not delegated to the United States by the Constitution shall be deemed to reside in the People, who will have been deemed to be too dumb to hold such powers, so they will cede said powers through a false notion of democracy to the Democrat Party, which will be enforced by the use of foreign law in the Federal judiciary.

When Charles deGaulle decided to retire from public life, the British ambassador and his wife threw a gala dinner party in his honor. At the dinner table, the Ambassador's wife was talking with Madame deGaulle: "Your husband has been such a prominent public figure, such a presence on the French and international scene for so many years! How quiet retirement will seem in comparison. What are you most looking forward to in these retirement years?"

"A penis," replied Madame deGaulle.

A huge hush fell over the table. Everyone heard her answer… and no one knew what to say next.

Le Grand Charles leaned over to his wife and said, "Ma cherie, I believe ze English pronounce zat word, 'appiness!'"

Three vampires walk into a bar. One orders a blood on the rocks. Another orders a double blood. The third simply asks for a mug of hot water.

"Why didn't you order blood like everyone else?" asks the bartender.

The vampire pulls out a tampon and says, "I'm making tea."

Yeah, that was bad! Blush I actually have worse.

From Stop The ACLU 

That should about cover it!

OK, three more bad jokes for Nettie

A gay man, finally deciding he could no longer hide his sexuality from his parents, went over to their house, and found his mother in the kitchen cooking dinner. He sat down at the kitchen table, let out a big sigh, and said, "Mom, I have something to tell you: I'm gay."

His mother made no reply or gave any response, and the guy was about to repeat it to make sure she'd heard him, when she turned away from the pot she was stirring and said calmly, "You're gay — doesn't that mean you put other men's penises in your mouth?"

The guy said nervously, "Uh, yeah, Mom, that's right." His mother went back to stirring the pot, then suddenly whirled around, whacked him over the head with her spoon and said, "Don't you EVER complain about my cooking again!!!!!"

Two children were in a doctor's waiting room. The little girl was softly sobbing.
"Why are you crying?" asked the little boy.

"I'm here for a blood test, and they're going to cut my finger," said the girl.

When he heard this, the little boy started to cry.

"Why are you crying?" asked the girl.

The boy looked at her worriedly and said, "I'm here for a urine test."

A guy sits down in a Cafe' and asks for the hot chili.

The waitress says, 'The guy next to you got the last bowl.'

He looks over and sees that the guy's finished his meal,
but the chili bowl is still full.

He says, 'Are you going to eat that?'

The other guy says, "No. Help yourself."

He takes it and starts to eat it. When he gets about half way down,
his fork hits something. He looks down sees a dead mouse in it, and he pukes the chili back into the bowl!

The other guy says, "That's about as far as I got, too."

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One Response to “Friday Nut Fun (on Friday this time!)”

  1. nettie says:

    you got worse, let’s hear it!

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