Hotcoldwetdry Could Release Sea Monsters?

I’m truly hoping that this is a bit of pre-Halloween satire, but, in Warmist World, you never know (via Tom Nelson)

(Your Abeline Online) Here’s another reason to worry about the melting of the arctic ice cap. Something might be under it, and by “thing” we don’t mean manganese nodules or junked Russian subs.

Scientists have identified a new species of marine reptile, the largest yet known, called Pliosaurus funkei. The scientists don’t really mean “funky.” The beast is named after its volunteer discoverers, Bjorn and May-Liss Funke, who found its fossils near the Svalbard Islands, halfway between Norway and the North Pole.

Dubbed Predator X until it was identified as a separate species and given a Latin name, this omnivorous sea monster stretched about 40 feet long, with four paddles, a weight of up to 45 tons and a 6.5-foot skull, with 12-inch teeth, that could generate 33,000 pounds of bite force. That’s considerably more than a Tyrannosaurus rex, which, as we know from “Jurassic Park,” could bite a Subaru in half — not that there was much call for that 150 million years ago.

Hold that thought. Because when global warming finally melts the polar ice cap, we don’t really know what we’ll find under it. There’s nothing like a 150 million-year hibernation to make a 40-foot pliosaur work up an appetite.

Pliosaurus funkei is a real name, and was initially dubbed Predator X. And I’m not finding anything that denotes the op-ed is satire in any form or fashion.

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7 Responses to “Hotcoldwetdry Could Release Sea Monsters?”

  1. Gumball_Brains says:

    Yes, because finding fossils previously hidden from view is very very bad. Never has it occurred in human history before.

    Maybe we need to give up the previous fossils and mummified mammoth remains…. to not make the other unknown unfound fossils angry at us.

  2. Gbear says:

    Take a bottle of Teamocil, it will be better in the morning.

  3. I worried that the aliens might get upset that their underwater bases are being put under too much water. 😉

  4. mojo says:

    What about the giant vultures? And the Blob?

  5. Gumball_Brains says:

    Giant Vultures are only in New York
    The Blob only happens in small mid-western locales.

  6. Release the cute and fuzzy giant otters!

  7. Gumball_Brains says:

    OMG NOOOOOO

    Did you see what they did to Newport Oregon?!?!?!

    Took the locals a whole 3 days just to ask the regional USFWS administrator permission to build otter traps. Then another 2 days to fill out the paperwork, a week to get all the stamps and signatures, and then 3 months to even find someone who knew what an otter looked like.

    And during all that time…. DESTRUCTION!!!!

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