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Welcome to week #97 of the Bonfire, the Sith Edition. Many Dark Jedi have submitted their works of evil, attempting to become the next Lord of the Sith, along with their lame evil and twisted excuses. “Always there are 2. A master and an apprentice.” Who will be whom? “I have a bad feeling about this.” These Dark Force users have ruled for 10080 minutes. For how much longer will they rule?
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All submissions are posted in the twisted and evil order they were received. “You don’t know the *power* of the Dark Side.” Mwahahahahahahahaha!
Kim at Ramble Strip has issues with Scott Savol. She understands that it is part of an evil, evil plan. Plus, a Sith cat peed in her shoes.
Boxing Alcibiades wants his hoverburgers now, otherwise he will be forced to use his choking grip.
At what point does a brouhaha become a fight for the rule of the galaxy? nikita demosthenes has the answer, as he discusses Princess Laura.
Dark Lord of the Green Gretchen Ross discusses something all Sith Lords enjoy: gluttony and huge cheeseburgers. Turning people into human pigs is one heck of a Dark Side power.
It’s never a good thing to write while drinking tequila dayquil. Stealing Bandwagons makes up for that, being evil and all. Sick, medicated, and a lack of sleep leads to the Dark Side, Jody. Which is the quick and easy path to getting things done.
Dark Jedi J takes shots at the Dearly Departed, proving that nothing is sacred at the Zero Boss. ” Many Bothans died to bring us this information. ”
Dodgeblogium takes a lightsaber to The Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy. It is “mildly diverting entertainment,” much like sending tie fighters into asteroid fields.
Sithgoddess Cao goes for a blatant attempt at whoring for blogads. And she can’t say that she won’t do it again. “I find your lack of faith disturbing.”
There is an identity crisis going on at The Conservative Dark Jedi Cat. ” The shroud of the Dark Side has fallen. Begun, the Clone Wars has.”
J Lo for President of the Empire? The American Princess has this twisted and evil thing down pat.
The Jawas, after learning evil mind tricks to wipe out Sandpeople, Report that Terri Schiavo has awakened from a persistent vegetative state.
Drinking clears up the skin? Who knew. Sith Lordess Beth knows. “Sith business, go back to your drinks.”
Practical Penumbra finds out that Boba Fett cheese is really good. “Always in motion is the future.”
Glenn Reynolds is forced into a Carbonite Freezing Chamber by Sean at The American Mind. It may not be bad, but it is definitely steps down the road to the Dark Side, plus, as he says, it just may be stupid.
Mustang 23 is getting Cabin Fever while on Tattooine. That can usually be solved by throwing a party and letting the Rancor loose.
Mad Anthony takes the really easy path to the Dark SIde by microwaving potato’s. He could have used his powers to cook them, but, hey, us Dark Side users should be lazy. We Rule.
Carpe Bonum has no post. Soup Sith included at no charge. “I sense something. A presence I’ve not felt since…the lunch counter ”
This is just evil. File It Under pooptasticness. “We’re doomed!”
Darth Normanous at Expresso Sarcasm describes the very definition of the phrase evil and twisted: Meme’s. “War does not make one great. Neither do meme’s.”
Storm trooper rifle in each hand, Techno Gypsy blasts away at both a sales presentation and that bastion of goodness (yech), Glenn Reynolds. Not all lawyers serve the Dark Side.
Rick Moran from Rightwing Nut House tries to expand his Sith powers to sarcasm, yet only attracted some denizens of the Moonbattery system. And soap. “Go to Ludicrous speed now!” (Sorry, Rick, couldn’t resist)
Hey, Look! Sex. 100 Girls! Oh, wait, it’s just a discussion. Now, that was plain evil for the sake of being evil, Lord(s) Multiple Mentality.
Dark Lord Ellison is trying going for the Sith Hall of Fame by respinning his vile, yet perversely enjoyable, turd in a punch bowl meme. He might make the Sith All Star team with this one.
Here’s a good way to decrease one’s Sith ranking: discuss love songs openly. Why? In his Musings from Brian J Noggle, “Reflections on the fleeting nature of youth. Or good taste.” “Bah, a Dark Jedi craves none of that.”
Is there anything better then tormenting Customer Service people for the heck of it? a4g at Point Five projects bolts of lightning through the telephone line. Why? He was in a groove. Also, he blames Lileks. Down the dark path of blame.
Burning things is right up a Dark Jedi’s alley. And Interested Participant wants to burn this. Guard Gators taste like chicken.
Dual Saber wielder Basil gives us his take on The Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy. Something involving dolphins. Sith Dolphins. “I am altering the deal. Pray I don’t alter it any further.”
Someone is destroying the comments in the Imperial Senate. Think Sink wants this fixed. Now. Twice. Brings it to the Imperial Forum. Can the Emperor help?
Posting for the hell of it? Yup. Evil. The American Warmonger discusses nothing, and does it well.
The Opinionated Bastard tells folks who don’t live in Outer Rim systems to shut up. Dark Side grip will soon be used. Maybe on Rebel La Shawn Barber.
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My own evil trek down the path of the Dark Side leads to evil songs in the head.
Just remember, “Once you start down the dark path, forever will it dominate your destiny.” Go for it. Now I will use my power of persuasion to get people to blogroll me.
A special thanks to Beth at My Vast Right Wing Conspiracy who hooked me up with the killer banner, and to Emperor “Kevin” Palpatine for allowing me to host this weeks Bonfire. Hopefully, the bandwith at Photobucket will last. Follow on hosts feel free to steal the banner.
Don’t forget, next weeks edition, #98, is at Conservative Cat. #99 at Pajama Pundits Go tell Kevin at Wizbang if you are interested.
If I have missed somebody, dropped a trackback, or anything else let me know. I won’t be around till the evening, so, in my Sith vanity, I hope everyone has enjoyed this as much as I did doing it.
PS: sorry about multiple trackbacks to a few folks, didn’t look like they were going through originally.
Read: Bonfire of the Vanities, week #97 »
