Too Many Evil People Are Eating Their Steaks Wrong

This is related to a debate I had on a website last week, in regards to people eating their steak wrong. Seriously, who ruins their steak by cooking it too much on purpose? I was told that this is Freedom, people should be allowed to eat their steak how they want. Look, we didn’t declare independence from Britain for this

(FiveThirtyEight)  Are people who prefer their steaks well done just wrong? (WT-yes) It’s the question that has divided a nation that is otherwise firmly united on the “steak is great” front, given that we Americans consume about 25 billion pounds of beef annually. It makes ordering at steakhouses for large parties a negotiation; it causes effete elitists like me to reconsider the measure of a diner; and I’m going to guess that the BTUs of gas spent taking perfectly good rare steaks to well done amount to an environmental catastrophe.

A May 2014 investigation from this very website — one which, by my own admission, began as a campaign to smear those who enjoyed well-done beef — found that when people self-reported their steak preferences, most said medium-rare, followed by medium and then medium-well.

But that’s just what people say they like. We’re living in a society where meat doneness preference has been used as a political cudgel against the holder of the highest office in the U.S. We have to get to the tender, marbled meat of the issue.

Look at that!!!!! A majority like their steaks done evil!!!!! The article describes some why’s, but, really, over 37% want their steaks totally evil!!!!! I’m done with this whole freedom thing!!!

I will say, I can understand why some people order medium. I do. Why? Because there has been a law against undercooked meat in Raleigh for a long time, so, people order medium in order to get medium rare if they know better.

Still, too many evil people!

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7 Responses to “Too Many Evil People Are Eating Their Steaks Wrong”

  1. judgeroybean says:

    Pretty sure I was a coyote in former life. Hence, steak should be served to humans the same way coyotes eat it. No salt, pepper, nothing. However, if eating steak well done smothered in salt and pepper pisses off the faggoty elitists, that’s the way it’s gonna be from now on.

  2. Jeffery says:

    judge,

    Yes! Absolutely nothing irks a liberal like well-done steaks! You should ALWAYS order them extra very well-done for the rest of your life, and just know you’re angering libs. Also, not eating braised kale pisses off liberals, so make them angry by always having a double side of kale.

  3. Edward Teach says:

    It really depends on the cut of meat. Lean steaks should be cooked less, but if the cut is well marbled, leave it on a little longer and get the fat to liquefy.
    The other mistake everyone makes is to take the meat out of the fridge and flop it straight on to the grill, and if you do that it won’t cook properly. What you need to do is take it out an hour or so before cooking and let it warm up, and that way it will cook through but not overcook.

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