Movie Review Time: 9 And Whiteout

Starting off with 9, I’ll give it a B-. It was a pretty darned good post-apocalyptic movie, saw it on the 9th, reminiscent of the 50’s B movie scifi flicks. Mankind is wiped out. All that is left are machines, and some little creatures an inventor created with spare parts and some cloth. The script was a bit thing as such, but, overall pretty decent. And, I cannot stress how great the graphics were. Simply freaking incredible. Well worth seeing at an afternoon matinee with the reduced prices. Don’t think I would pay night time fees, since it is only 89 minutes long, but, worth seeing in the afternoon.

And, it is PG-13. Has some good violence and scary scenes. As I’ve done with other good movies, that is all I am going to say. Check it out.

Next up, Whiteout, which I saw this afternoon. Solid D. Only saving grace was Kate Beckinsale in her skivvies, but, that doesn’t save it. Oh, and the popcorn at the theater I go to is really good. But, that is incidental, and it’s good regardless of the movie.

Slight spoiler below the more tag

Is it science fiction? Um, no, though, the previews sure make it seem like it. I suspect it is supposed to be a suspense/action thriller. If so, it fails. Miserably. I would have had more fun taking $20 and throwing it in the air, chasing after it.

It starts off rather dumb, with the co-pilot of a plane trying to kill the people in the back, and failing. Miserably. Then we are treated to Kate wandering around, ending up in her quarters (this takes place in the Antarctic,) then stripping down to her undies in order to take a shower, which we then see her sort of strip off to take a shower. Why? No friggin’ clue, other than to create a shot of Kate in the shower as seen through steamy glass. Otherwise, the scene was worthless. Unless the writers realized that the script sucked ass and were covering it up.

The script did suck. Badly. Even some pretty good actors couldn’t cover that up. The camera work sucked, too. The beauty of Antarctica was made boring. The few action scenes were covered up by massive blowing snow. Characters make strange leaps of logic that make you think parts of the moving are missing. There was little buildup towards the finale, so, the suspenseful music was wasted.

Even Kate cannot save this fiasco. Had I rented it, I would have shut it down 20 minutes in. The critics and viewers give it higher ratings than I do, so, you will have to make up your own mind.

Big spoiler coming. Like, the whole point of what happens

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If you’ve watched the movie previews, you might have heard the part about a secret that would shock the world, and is best left secret. That’s one of the reasons so many think it is a scifi movie. Want to know the big secret? Diamonds. Yup. Big f’ing woop.

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